Please Mom and Dad: A Poem for Child Abuse Prevention

Understanding child development plays a crucial role in preventing child abuse by helping caregivers, educators, and others who interact with children respond more appropriately to their needs and behaviors. Here’s how:

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1. Sets Realistic Expectations

Many cases of child abuse stem from frustration when children don't meet unrealistic expectations. Knowledge of child development helps adults understand:

• What behaviors are typical at different ages (e.g., tantrums in toddlers, risk-taking in teens).

• That developmental milestones (talking, walking, potty training) occur at different times for each child.
  → This reduces the risk of adults reacting with anger or punishment.

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2. Promotes Positive Discipline

Understanding how children learn and grow allows caregivers to choose age-appropriate and non-violent ways to guide behavior:

• For example, using redirection for toddlers rather than physical punishment.

• Using consistent, calm approaches with older children instead of verbal or emotional abuse.

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3. Improves Communication

Adults who understand child development are better at interpreting children’s communication—even when it's nonverbal:

• A crying infant isn’t being “manipulative”—they’re expressing a need.

• A defiant teenager may be struggling with emotional regulation, not trying to disrespect.

→ This reduces the chance of misinterpreting behavior as intentional misbehavior.

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4. Builds Empathy and Patience

When caregivers understand that children’s brains and emotions are still developing, they:

• Feel more empathy toward children’s struggles.

• Are more patient and supportive instead of punitive.

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5. Supports Early Intervention

Knowledge of developmental stages helps adults:

• Recognize signs of developmental delays or emotional issues.

• Seek help early before stress escalates to frustration or abuse.

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6. Strengthens Caregiver Confidence

Educated caregivers feel more competent and less stressed, making them less likely to lash out:

• Confidence reduces the emotional burnout that can lead to abusive reactions.

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7. Breaks the Cycle of Abuse

Adults who experienced abuse as children may not know what healthy parenting looks like. Learning about child development:

• Provides tools to parent differently.

• Replaces harmful learned behaviors with supportive ones.

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Understanding child development doesn’t just help prevent abuse—it lays the foundation for nurturing, supportive relationships that help children thrive. It shifts the focus from control and punishment to guidance and empathy.

Please Mom and Dad...

My hands are small.

I don’t mean to spill my milk.

My legs are short.

Please slow down so I can keep up with you.

Don’t slap my hands when I touch something bright and pretty.

I don’t understand.

Please look at me when I talk to you.

It lets me know you are really listening.

My feelings are tender.

Don’t nag me all day. Let me make mistakes without feeling stupid.

Don’t expect the bed I make or the picture I draw to be perfect.

Just love me for trying.

Remember, I am a child, not a small adult.

Sometimes I don’t understand what you are saying.

I love you so much.

Please love me just for being me, not just for the things I can do.